Thursday, May 13, 2010

MTV Peers into Robert Pattinson's Future With Funny Photos

The following is all in good fun people! So don't take it too seriously :)

From Hollywood Crush for MTV: Unlike his character Edward Cullen, as Robert Pattinson turns another year older, he ages likewise.

We've watched our favorite Brit age from when he hit mainstream Hollywood at 19 years old in "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" to today, when he turns 24. So what better way to celebrate his birthday than to show the world — and Rob! — what his future holds in store. Be warned, much hilarity lies in store after the jump.

At age 30, four years after the final installment of "Breaking Dawn" comes out on DVD, Rob and Kristen Stewart will have moved their separate ways and, clinging to the fading glory of his turn as sparkly vamp Edward, Rob will decide to settle down with a beautiful young "Twilight" fan, who unsurprisingly bears a striking resemblance to a 20-year-old KStew. Instead of exchanging rings and vows, she asks that they consummate their marriage by signing her chest.

After 10 years of happily wedded bliss, Rob will have lost his sort-of toned physique and ballooned up 60 pounds. However, despite weighing over 200 pounds, he still finds time to take his two daughters (ages 8 and 5) to basketball practice. It took much coaxing from his wife to let them play the American sport instead of the much more British soccer.

By age 50, Rob will have tired of being out of the Hollywood circuit and will trim down and grow a mustache in order to pursue the role of his career: a serious turn as a World War II prisoner. It will earn him his first Academy Award but, despite studio insistence, he will refuse to sign on for the film's five sequels and subsequent toy line, saying he has done his time in franchise film series'

True love never dies, and at age 60 Rob and Kristen will find each other again… this time to star together in the remake of the Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton classic "Something's Gotta Give." Despite the fact that during the filming process Rob divorced his wife and moved into Kristen's 8,000,000 square foot vampire-themed mansion in Transylvania, the two maintained that they were "just friends."

Unfortunately, Rob didn't age as well as the vampire who made him a star, and by age 70 and nearly unrecognizable, he has entered a retirement home. Kristen didn't want to make it seem like the two of them had "a thing," so she had younger costar Taylor Lautner move in to her humble abode while making covert visits to Rob in his nursing home nearby.

{via MTV}


  1. ah, man, that's just sad.. D:

  2. Omfg that's I dunno hilarious and sad at the same time!

  3. LOL omg thats LAO funny I love it had 2 send it to everyone I know 8^)

  4. Fail.

    It was run the mill sardonic humour, maybe something a bit more refreshing would have been entertaining. I expected more from MTV.